The most incredible person I’ve ever known. My best friend, and the love of my fucking life.Source: sonnyah
The first day I met you, I shaved my legs just in case.
I thought that if I was able to minimize myself
you would love me a little bit harder -
as if the less of me, the more of love.
And someone once told me the only weapons
you needed in a relationship were:
a creaky mattress frame if you hated
your neighbours, a pregnancy test
and a broken beer bottle.
(I never used the beer bottle.)
the world doesn’t believe in Greek goddesses
anymore. I couldn’t possibly be one in your eyes.
I thought waking up in the morning would be
easier if only my hands would be able to shake
the way yours do. And I remember
the first morning I did wake up next to you,
and we didn’t do anything, and you asked
me why we didn’t do anything and I said
because life hurts and it would hurt even more
if someone I didn’t love who loved me
was fucking me.
And I think that was about the time when you left
my house at five in the morning before my parents could hear.
I don’t know what love is but I know it hurts
especially when you’re staring out of a window,
and your bed still smells like him,
and you’re relieved
because whatever this “love” is -
whatever the poems were written about
whatever the books were written about
whatever the music was written about
whatever I had written about
it wasn’t this.
And you would be glad too.
Last time I heard, he was cutting through
rails of coke with his Goodlife gym membership card.